Adventures of an Aspiring Plant Lady: Here We Go

Keeping a plant alive is hard. A dog or cat will offer a variety of expressions or behaviors to indicate something is wrong; they'll stop eating for a few days, their stomach will make noise, and if they're in pain they'll yelp or meow. They look up at you with their adorable little animal eyes and say "hey, I need to go on a walk" or "please stop bothering me I'm trying to sleep".

But plants just sit there, and wilt. And wilting can mean anything. It could be caused by rotting roots from overwatering, or dried out roots from under-watering. It could be because the temperature is too cold, or too hot, or it's too sunny. It could be a sign of a pest infestation, or a desperate plea for some kind of fertilizer. It could even mean your plant is annoyed that you're watching that episode of Friends for the 4th time that week.

Okay, maybe not that last one. But to someone with almost no knowledge of how to keep a plant alive, these vague warning signs are difficult to decipher, and make my aspirations to be a plant lady seem more daunting than my impending graduation from graduate school (it's fine, everything is fine).

So, like Julie Powell, I've decided to document my exploration of this new hobby. Except instead of trying out recipes I'll be trying to keep these little green friends of mine alive, and instead of Julia Child as a guide I have the whole, plant-related internet (an unsurprisingly robust corner of the web).

Above are my latest victims. I mean plants. I have three succulents, basil, and thyme, and will try to post updates and discoveries every month. To start here are a few things I've learned so far:

  1. Basil is surprisingly receptive to water. All of the plants sit on the sill of an east facing window, and on a sunny morning they wake up to very direct, harsh sunlight. By the time I wake up at 8am they've been sunbathing for at least an hour or so, and the basil plant is usually starting to wilt (apparently indoor potted plants tend to dry out much faster and may require more frequent watering). So before I make myself a very necessary cup of coffee, I give these little guys and gals a drink, and I'm always shocked at how quickly the basil leaves perk right up. Within 10 minutes there's a noticeable difference, and the plant goes from looking like a withered 97-year-old man to a lively teen (weird analogy? Idk). Honestly, no matter how long I manage to keep these plants alive, I will always be amazed by this. It's like watching one of those time lapse videos of a flower blooming only it's happening in real life before my eyes. Ah, nature.
  2. You can, in fact, kill succulents. And with relative ease, at that. I learned this well before this month but it was my first clue that I may not be gifted with a green thumb. I hopped on the succulent band wagon after seeing the 400th (rough estimate) Refinery29 article about how easy it is to care for succulents. "They practically take care of themselves!" But no. They don't. Because if you don't water them they die and if you do water them they die. So I decided to turn to people who know more about gardening, and upon purchasing my latest batch of succulents I followed careful instructions from Succulents and Sunshine when repotting them and so far so good. I probably jinxed it just now, though, so we'll see.
  3. Gooseneck coffee kettles (like this one) make for a great watering can. For those of you who, like myself, lack any storage and live in a teeny tiny box, finding household objects with multiple uses is key to living a happy, healthy life. 

That's all I've got, so far, but I'm excited to keep caring for these little plants and learning about indoor plant care. Starting out with monthly posts about problems I've encountered and what I've discovered, and we'll see how this goes.